This dial up is sucky....It takes SOOOOOOOO LONGGGGG!! Yeah, I'll get over it. My kids are extra cute today. My girl has little pig tails in her hair and her new fleece outfit on...She so primped and styling and she knows it. To the ways of the world she maybe dressed like a little boy, but I think her outfit is awesome! I wish I had one.....Actually I think if I look I do, just not the same color code. Its been an exhausting day...I have to work tonight and I couldn't get a wink of sleep all day. I slept last night, but I'm going to be so tired. I'm having Scott drive me to work so that I don't have to worry about how safe I'll be in the morning.

Scott and I sat down and talked today about what I should do about my sucky job....He basically told me that I need to just quit and he would go looking for a job really soon. And maybe I could get a part time job if we can find a way to do it without paying a sitter. We'll figure it out. We have to cut our trip to Texas short, so we'll have enough money for our expenses, but we're still going to Cairn. There's a lot of problems I've been dealing with my job, and there's got to be a stopping point, before God puts a big warning sign up. My health is getting very cruddy very fast and I'm not sure how much further I can push myself. I told Scott these next four nights are my last, that way they still have a week covered to find someone else. I was thinking about going to day shift, but the way my boss works, I'll never get it until five months from now. I said forget it. We'll figure it out. I mainly left this whole decision up to Scott, since he has a better look at things. He's the one who has to put up with me when I'm in pain or feeling sick, and he's also the one who would have to go looking for another job. He didn't really think too hard about it, he had his mind made that he would do whatever it takes as long as I don't have to work at that place anymore.

This isn't easy for me though. I know what lines are being drawn, but I almost feel as if I'm letting my family down.....I wish I could just wake up tomorrow and be okay , no back pain, no knee pain, no migraines, no muscle spasms.........but God is good no matter what. He'll help me through this 'suck up your pride and have faith in God' time. God will succeed in providing for us. His little noisy brats that whine and worry all the way to His throne, until he bops us on the head and asks, "Who do you think I am??? Do you really think I'll let anything happen to YOU??? Your mine, and mine alone, I've got your back."

Thanks Scotty, I love you!!!!!